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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27828610">The Daemon Slayer and The Mechanic</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkestDandelion/pseuds/TheDarkestDandelion'>TheDarkestDandelion</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Daemon, the Soldier and a Stolen Bio-Weapon AU [116]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Final Fantasy XV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ardyn Izunia Needs A Hug, Attempt at Humor, Chaos, Cid Sophiar - Freeform, Crack, Daemon Slayer Iris Amicitia, Daemons, Humor, M/M, Mentions Gilgamesh (Final Fantasy XV), Peeping, Poor Cerbie, Pranks, Scared Ardyn Izunia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:23:13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,424</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27828610</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkestDandelion/pseuds/TheDarkestDandelion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>No, Ardyn. You are the Adagium! The bringer of darkness! You’re not scared of two mere mortals, one who was now getting on in years and the other who was a mere girl who used to play with dolls when she was younger. You’re not scared at all!</p><p>That was what Ardyn tried to tell himself. But the truth of it was, he was scared shitless of both Iris Amictia, the Daemon Slayer and Cid Sophair, his honorary father-in-law!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ardyn Izunia &amp; Cid Sophiar, Ardyn Izunia/Cor Leonis, Cerberus (Final Fantasy XV) &amp; Ardyn Izunia, Iris Amicitia &amp; Ardyn Izunia</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Daemon, the Soldier and a Stolen Bio-Weapon AU [116]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1310333</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Daemon Slayer and The Mechanic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiary/gifts">Shiary</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Really silly little fic that!! </p><p>I hope you enjoy this madness XD </p><p>Thank you Shiart for the suggestion!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Ardyn looked down the corridor nervously, Cerbie close to his heels with all six of his ears down, also looking up and down the long corridor to make sure the coast was clear.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on boy.” Ardyn gulped, tip-toeing down the corridor as quietly and as quickly as he could. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All he and Cerbie had to do was get to their quarters. Since Somnus and Regis thought his current predicament was sooo humours they had purposely set up the daemon security system to turn on - on very low mind you so Cerbie didn’t burn to a crisp - if he used any of his daemonic powers. Meaning that he couldn’t simply poof them both to safety. They had to take the long route and of course Cor thought all of this was okay too! This was not okay in the slightest! Cerbie had already shat himself twice today and Ardyn very nearly went into a state of panic as the daemons were in an absolute frenzy. But all would be fine! So very fine if they got to the-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey Ardyn!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn tensed up and Cerbie immediately forced himself between his dada’s legs for protection, trying his best to cover all six of his eyes with his front paws.   </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ardyn!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn grimaced and gave Iris Amicitia a small wave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was just one person who he and Cerbie did not want to interact with anymore.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello, my dear.” Ardyn said sheepishly, taking a small step away from her as she continued to approach him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cor’s been looking for you. Apparently, you need to discuss what you are doing for Prom’s birthday.” Iris smiled through a happy and sweet tone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll get right on it, don’t you worry.” Ardyn nodded frantically, trying his hardest to remain calm as every single daemon in his body was screaming for him to get the hell away from the now legendary Daemon Slayer.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tilted her head slightly, offering him a comforting smile. “Are you alright? You seem kinda jumpy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I am fine!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He blurted out, trying to rationalise in his head that she was only a 19-year-old girl. He had nothing to fear at all. He had known her since her birth and she was a lovely, young lady who would never hurt a soul. He wasn’t scared, because there was nothing to be scared of. Other than the fact she had managed just the other week to take out Deathclaw by herself. That wasn’t terrifying in the slightest. That didn’t make all the daemons in his head want to run to Angelgard just so they could feel safe. And it certainly was not making Cerberus currently pee all over his shoes out of terror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aww, Cerbie.” Iris said, leaning on her knees. “Is he okay, Ardyn? Does he want a hug?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cerbie recoiled away, whimpering, forcing Ardyn to move back with him as he hooked one of his heads around his leg. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, I don’t think he does…” Ardyn cringed, trying not to heave at the fresh smell of his dog’s urine. “We best be on our way now, Iris. Lovely to see you. Tootles!”   </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His heart was pounding in his chest as he sharply turned in the other direction with the full intention of sprinting down that hall at top speed. However, he soon wished he hadn’t turned around. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cerbie’s scared whimpers got a little louder as Ardyn froze on the spot as he came face to face with the only other person he was terrified of. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cid. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ya dog pissed on ya.” Cid snorted, staring down at the floor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn held in a squeak of pure terror, now stuck between the only two people on Eos who had the ability to terrify the shit out of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No, Ardyn. You are the Adagium! The bringer of darkness! You’re not scared of two mere mortals, one who was now getting on in years and the other who was a mere girl who used to play with dolls when she was younger. You’re not scared at all!</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn tried his best to tell himself that, but it didn’t work. Cold sweat was dripping down his back and all the scourge refused to exit his body. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hello, Mr Sophair. I am aware of the situation.” Ardyn said, feet rooted to the ground. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Umm… Reggie said ya wanted to talk to me?” Cid grumbled, not bothering to hide his amusement. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did he now?!” Ardyn squealed in a high pitched tone ready to strangle his nephew for lying. “You have a wasted journey I am afraid, Cerberus and I were going to have a nap!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait a second! You still need to see Cor.” Iris’s voice rang through his hyperactive ears as she stepped in front of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Acting completely on impulse, Ardyn took a step away from the pair, wanting to cry, knowing full well both his husband and his nephew had set him up like this on fucking purpose. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Why?! Why would they do this to him and Cerbie?! </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ya better not keep my kid waiting, daemon.” Cid said, narrowing his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s for Prom’s birthday as well, uncle Cid.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why ain’t ya hoppin’ then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know. Are you okay Ardyn you look a little shook up.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Because I am too scared to move! </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn screamed in his head, feeling Cerbie pee on him just that little bit more. By this point he didn’t care. All he wanted was for the pair of them to leave him alone! Was that too much to ask for?! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There you are!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At his husband’s voice, Ardyn phased backwards just behind Cor, he held on to Cor’s shoulder’s and hid behind him, shaking like a leaf as Cebie ran towards his daddy at top speed, also wanting protection.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey what’s wrong with you two?” Cor asked, in a gentle and calm voice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Them!” Ardyn shouted, pointing at both Cid and Iris who had now lost themselves in fits of laughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ya really that scared us!” Cid roared with laughter, as Iris giggled next to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YES!” Ardyn screamed. “Why won’t the pair of you leave me alone!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry, uncle Ardyn. It’s just really funny!” Iris laughed covering her mouth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t find it funny! And neither does Cerbie! He pissed himself!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Cerberus.” Cor gasped, bending down to stroke his dog and give him much love. And in return, he got lots and lots of kisses. “Did grandad and Iris scare you? Did they? They are so mean. So mean. Have a treat, Cerbie. Who’s a good boy? You are.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Grandad?! </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>No! Ardyn was not allowing that man to be Cerbie’s grandad! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>However, Ardyn was still too scared to make his dislike for this new advancement known and he’d much prefer to stay behind his husband. The daemons in his head were starting to calm down a little in Cor’s presence. But they were still on edge, ready to vanish into thin air if either the Daemon Slayer or his honorary father-in-law got too close.   </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Wait a second! </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn’s jaw fell to the floor as the realisation hit him. It wasn’t Regis who had set this up, Cor had done it all by himself! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cor Leonis!” Ardyn yelled, gritting his teeth together. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cor broke out in a fit of laughter. “I am sorry! I couldn’t resist it!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is not funny!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is, daemon, it really is.” Cid continued to howl with laughter, not caring for how Ardyn was feeling in the slightest.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You made our dog piss on me!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well done Cerbie for pissing on dada!” Cor laughed harder, giving a lot more praise to his dog than before.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn exhaled sharply, deciding that he was leaving now. One he was too scared to stay and he didn’t want to talk to Cor. Well for the time being. Maybe for an hour… 20 minutes… yeah! He didn’t want to talk to Cor for 20 minutes! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh come on Ass Hat!” Cor called out after him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nope!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ardyn shouted, hearing the patter of his dog's feet behind him as he walked in the direction of Somnus’s quarters. Gilgamesh was there and he knew Cor would not follow.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>From that day on Ardyn made it his mission to avoid being in the same room as both Cid Sophair and Iris Amicitia ever again. He simply could not contain his terror around them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t understand it! They were both mortals! They were no real threat towards him! </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just one of the many mysteries of his weird and wondrous head it would seem. </span>
</p>
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